whAt a GoObeR...

note: these gloves that he is so proudly displaying were in fact his birthday gift to me. he picked them out, wrapped them, the whole nine yards. and then he took them. i've been 26 for nearly 2 weeks and have yet to wear these things. they apparently resemble a green version of spiderman's gloves, and thus have been used as such since there confiscation. i guess it was the thought that counts and besides, they look better on him anyways;)

hUH?

ok. what im about to say, or write, (or blog, if you will) may not make a bit of sense to some people and thats ok. im never sure if anything i write makes sense until after i go back to re-read it, and then sometimes i still don't know. i'm not even sure yet what my point is going to be, i just know that i've been disturbed about things that are completely subjective in their contexts and by no means should my thoughts be thought of as right because i know that they are not. but they are mine and thus the reasoning that i share them with you:)
anyways, for one of my classes i just had to write a paper on what exactly the sin of Ham (remember him, in Genesis, his dad Noah..) was. I remembered the story going into it, his dad got drunk and he went in and saw him blahblahblah. but as i was researching it, i came across this article that goes into all these details pointing towards the fact that Ham's true sin was in all likelihood an act of maternal rape. im not trying to dispute this issue whatsoever, for i am obviously no Biblical scholar, but as i was reading this article, it went on to point out the symbolic similarities between the Flood and the Creation story, one of them being the underlying sexual connotations underpinning the serpent's temptation of Eve and the later rape of Noah's wife. it then went on to point out all of these lewd sexual sins committed in the Old Testament and pretty much alluded to the sexual underlinings throughout the entire Bible. as i said before, im not, actually i cant argue yay or nay about any of these specific topics but it just made me sick to my stomach a little. im not really sure why, exactly, but it did. maybe its because it seems like sex is so pervasive in today's society and to some it has been taught to be quite a disgusting and dirty ordeal and then those attitudes seem to be reaffirmed over and over again. alot of times it seems like thats all that a guy wants in a girl, and this seems to have been the case alot during the Biblical ages as well. i know this isn't the whole story, i know this. but it feels this way sometimes, to me, maybe not to anyone else, but to me, so that makes it valid in a subjective kind of way, correct? in conclusion, i still haven't figured out what my point is exactly except that i know it is impossible to completely eradicate sexual immorality and yet i pray that it might soon be eradicated in my little corner of the world.

"thE iSneSs Of tHe ShAll bE"

"In the face of fear and uncertainty,

the faithful remnant...remain agents of hope

in what theologian Oscar Cullman

calls the 'isness of the shall be.' "

Brennan Manning- The Wisdom of Tenderness

AleXandRa kAtiLYn fOrd "aLLie"

welcome little sis!

aN aLL AmeRicaN fAmiLy (A La 2o06)

it was not so very long ago that i felt rather out of place amongst my peers with regards to my family of origin. it seemed as though i was completely outnumbered when it came to having a family which was still intact, by that i mean a mom and a dad (the original one's..) who were still married. in fact, from what ive heard, we were pretty much a poster family for the 1950's definition of such..a mom, a dad, 2 kids,and a dog (we never had a white picket fence which i think is included in the original meaning of the word, ours was wooden). there were times, in my immature adolescent mindset where i was almost embarressed that my parents were still married, just cuz it wasn't the norm, and i was all about being like everyone else (please dont judge...i had alot of adolescent stupidity moments and thoughts, i dont know where my mind was for about 3 or 4 years ). when i developed a little, mentally speaking, and realized that it was actually a real treasure in this day and age to have a family that still contained all of its original members, they switched it up on me. a divorce ensued and i became like "everyone" else who no longer had parents that were together. and that was that. and yet things did not stay that way for long. oh no, why would they? pretty soon i found myself with a new stepmom and 2 little step brothers. good things. a little bizarre at first, considering my brother and i had been grown and out of the house for quite some time, but exciting no less. and then it became even more bizarre, and yet actually more normal the more i've thought about it. there are some pretty crazy family situations these days no doubt. as sad as it is, untraditional families seem to be outnumbering the traditional ones, which makes mine completely normal:) so, as of tomorrow, 2 days before my 26th birthday mind you, i will have a brand new baby sister! how cool is that? i think its even cooler that Joey will have an aunt that is 4 years younger then him...ha! its crazy indeed, but here in 2006, anything seems to pass as normal, which is what ive always strived to be...here's to normalcy and little sis's:)

An eND in sIGht (eXtreMely DisTant, buT theRe No LesS..)

up until this past week, i had just about given up the hope of ever being done with school. and im not talking school as in some people out there who just keep going because they love it and after 20 years of higher education they have like 8 doctorate degrees and still yearn to go back to whole the educational scene. no, i mean i'd relinquished all hope of simply earning my undergrad in less then two decades. it just wasnt working out for me to advance school-wise in any kind of timely manner. so i made the choice to accept that and as every new semester rolled around i tried to make the best of the fact that i didnt seem to be getting anywhere. so then, a couple of nights ago, i was doing my registration for next semester's classes. as i checked off the newest set of classes on my little "degree plan" i realized that im halfway done with my undergraduate courseload. this was monumental to me. even though it seems like ive been in and out of school for ever, in reality because this is my 3rd (yes, 3rd...) college, ive lost credits trying to transfer them, and then ive had moments of stupidity where ive dropped classes (once i dropped 4 of them at once after being 2/3 of the way done with them) here and there and then with this whole distance learning program ive been in, they've had extensions(which they have now done away with, thank goodness...) that i've purchased which add an extra 2 months to each semester and yadiyadi ya..the point being, progression has been slow. very slow. i kick myself everytime i hear "so and so just graduated from Georgia State" and realize that they used to be people i babysat (well, not really, but it seems like that sometimes, and it wont be long, im sure before that starts happening). i know it could be worse, i could be 50 doing this, but most days i felt as though id still be doing this at 50. so, anyways, im halfway there, and because i like to try and be a glass half full type of person, im siked! who cares that im going to need a master's to do anything productive with a psych degree, at least i can see light at the end of this long, long tunnel that houses my educational career.

cOoL DudE

Brett dennen..he's my new fav. well, not brand new. danny told me about him a month or so ago and the more i listen to this guy, the more i love him. its all the better when you get a visual before you hear him. because its only then that it makes any sense listening to his music.. his face fits:) check brett out

SpeCulatiONs

so, i've made some observations. speculations, if you will. they aren't necesarily recent, yet last night i realized the validity of what i'd already pre-supposed. let me explain: musically, i'm a lyric person. if set to the right melody, the words of a song can make me cry which is a feat in and of itself for those that know me well. anyways, a couple of years ago i began to realize that a ton of songs involve themes surrounding love, specifically romantic love. this is no new news, love has been written about since the onset of language. but at this particular time of my life, i was beginning to experience the ramifactions of God's love in my life and so love for me was taking on a whole new understanding. it was (and is) fantastic. so i began to listen to all of these "love" songs with new meaning and found that most of them can be directly correlated to one's relationship with God. sometimes a few words needed to be switched around or changed, but the general gist of it applied to both types of love and when applied to one's relationship with God, the words, for me at least, became even more meaningful...one in particular was a song by Rascal Flatts...read these lyrics and tell me that they dont directly describe the lives of so many Christians, including me...

Rascal Flatts - Bless The Broken Road Lyrics

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

change a couple of phrases around and you just read a brief summary of my life and im sure many other Christians, and these were the thoughts i had when this first hit the charts. so, bringing it back to last night...im on my way home from somewhere and am listening to the Christian radio station (which i admit i was once a regular listener, but im not anymore, i promise:)...) and guess what song comes on? yup, this one, sung by some sappy, "Christian" sounding singer (somehow you can just tell most of the time by their voice that they sing Christian music..yea? maybe its just me...) who in no way gave it as good a rendition as my boys, but still, my speculations proved to be correct! good things.