eXPosUre

ive been thinking alot lately about being exposed. it is a very good thing in so many situations. for instance, jobs. you get the right exposure, do your thing, you move up. exposure in sports...same deal, you get seen, you meet people, success comes. and yet when exposure happens at a deeper, personal level, it can suck. i dont really want people to know me, at the deepest levels of who i am, cuz its ugly and its so much better to hide it all. i think for me, the last 5 or 6 years have been so incredibly easy to get away with hiding behind this facade which inhibits exposure. theres been a great force in my life that has seemingly been able to cast a shadow over me and has enabled me to hide the crap. well, God's removed this shadow and ive been cast into the light. it ain't pretty. it can seem pretty for awhile, but having nobody to hide behind anymore, that prettiness does not last long. thus, ive been exposed. and initially it sucks. everybody wants people to think they've got their stuff together, well perhaps not everybody but i do. then the truth comes out and the demise is shattered. its exposure at its finest and it starts to seem like exposure in and of itself is overrated. yet im beginning to realize that this ugliness revealed, that true life exposed is what has the potential to bring about even more freedom then ive already experienced. note that i said im beginning to realize this, its not a done deal yet, and i could still potentially take this statement back completely. there is grace though even when those ugly, ugly hidden parts of us seep out into the surface. i see the potential for good things, very good things. i will keep you posted as im thinking i may eventually conclude that even this deepest facet of exposure is ultimatly good as well...